The premise of this story is that this woman is going to Britain to see the royal wedding to find true love.
As always, thanks for the comments on the previous story. (Mom, I'm glad you liked it. :))
Title: True Love (suggestions welcomed, fed, and given lots of love)
Warnings: one cuss word, kissing, fluff, muteness
Summary: A woman goes to Britian to watch the royal wedding and find true love.
Length: ~3,750 words
Notes: Third person point of view, past tense. The genre is romance.
Disclaimer: I don't own Lady Gaga's song "Born This Way."
TRUE LOVE
Tap. Tap. Tap. Her fingers made beautiful noises against the armrest. Tap. Tap. Tap. It had a nice rhythm to it.
Apparently, not everyone agreed. James’s hand descended upon hers, stilling her fingers’ restless tapping. She started, heart racing a bit at the contact. His hand was warm and masculine and irritating.
May looked over at him with a frown. He merely raised one barely-there blond eyebrow with a slight smirk.
“Alright, so I’m anxious,” May admitted. “But I can’t help it! We’re on a bit of a schedule here, if you haven’t noticed! And who would’ve thought that our plane would get delayed?”
James just kept smirking. She’d never met anyone who was as good at smirking as James. He was good at every expression, really – he had to be. When you’re mute, you have to rely on expressions a lot.
“Okay, okay, I get it. Obviously I should have been prepared for this. But I was hoping for the best.”
James finally released her hand as his nimble fingers moved. She concentrated carefully; she was still getting the hang of sign language.
It’s fine to hope for the best, but you should still prepare for the worst.
“Yeah, well… That’s no fun.”
James’s mouth opened in a silent laugh. The first time she had ever seen him laugh, she’d found it strange that he made no sound. But she was getting more used to it over the months that she’d known him.
“Oh, stop it, you jerk. It doesn’t matter, anyway – our plane didn’t get delayed that long. We should still make it on time to see the royal wedding.”
Oh goody, James signed. If it was possible for hands to have a tone, then his tone was sarcastic. May was a little miffed.
“Hey, you agreed to go with me,” she said. “And being British and all, you really ought to be more interested in the affairs of your royals. Uh, well, not affairs, exactly, but –”
She cut herself off when James started laughing again.
“Have it your way,” May said. “But don’t blame me when all you find at the wedding is some old spinster instead of the beautiful Playboy bunny I know you came over here for.”
James rolled his eyes. But May wasn’t paying much attention anymore. She turned to stare out the window at the gray clouds, deep in thought.
James might just be going for a quick fling. But May was going because she wanted to see true love. Sure, it sounded cheesy, and maybe it was, but she could think of no better place to witness true love than at the royal wedding. She certainly hadn’t witnessed much true love in her life. Her parent’s lackluster marriage came immediately to mind, as did the vicious fights between her sister and her sister’s boyfriend. There was definitely no true love there.
May had a feeling that once she saw true love at the wedding, then she’d find it. Because she hadn’t been having much luck finding it just wandering around. Her last relationship had lasted all of three weeks before they both decided that it just wasn’t working.
But when she got to the wedding – she could just picture it. She’d be among the crowds, thousands of people who were all romantics come to watch the wedding. They’d watch Prince William and Kate drive down the street, and then she’d look around and lock eyes with someone and – love. Just like that.
Or at least, she’d figure out how to recognize true love when she saw it.
James tugging on her sleeve brought her attention back to the here and now.
“What is it?” she asked him.
We’re about to land.
“Oh, good!” May said with a quick glance at her watch. Their connecting flight was at 7:00 A.M., and it was 6:20. “We should have plenty of time to catch our connecting flight.”
Hope for the best, expect the worst, James signed.
“Stop it, you!” May laughed, giving James a half-hearted shove on her shoulder. He grinned. He had really nice teeth, May noticed. Much nicer than she’d heard that the English had.
True love. She’d find true love in just three hours. She was sure of it.
♥♥♥
“Okay, maybe I spoke too soon,” May said half an hour later. The plane had just landed in Manchester
James graced her with a superior nod.
“Don’t say I told you so.”
I told you so.
At May’s irritated glare, he simply shrugged and signed with a fake-innocent expression, What? I didn’t say it.
“Clever,” May said with as much sarcasm as she could manage. Somehow, she couldn’t express as much sarcasm with her voice and James could with his hands. Show-off.
Ten to fifteen minutes later, they were finally ready to leave. May grabbed their suitcases and hustled her way to the front of the plane, counting on James to follow her eventually. They’d only known each other for about six months, but she felt like they knew each other pretty well. May was the rushed one, while James was all calm, cool, and collected. May saw no reason to challenge that role now.
“Excuse me, excuse me,” she muttered as she pushed her shoved her way to the exit. It was already 6:50, somehow. They had ten minutes to make it onto the next plane to London
Once outside, May waited impatiently for James to make it out. He didn’t take too long, but once she saw his blond head looking around for her, she grabbed his arm and started walking. They had no time to waste.
They were near-running, May still dragging James along, when James suddenly dug in his heels and stopped. May turned to him, questioning, and saw that he was pointing at one of the arrivals and departures boards. May’s eyes followed his finger and found their flight. “BOARDING” it proclaimed in bold green letters.
“Shit,” May cursed, “We have to go now!” But James still wouldn’t move. His hands began moving, and May forced herself to focus on what he was saying.
We should ask someone. See if it’s worth it to run all the way. The gate might be –
“Okay,” May said, turning away from James. She’d gotten the gist of what he was saying. She quickly spotted an elderly airport official and walked over to the portly man.
“Excuse me, sir,” May said quickly, “Could you tell me where Gate 39A is? And whether we could make it there in, like, a few minutes?”
“I’m afraid not, miss,” the man replied, and May was almost too worried to notice the British accent. Almost. “It’s on the whole other end of the terminal. You’d have to take the next right, and then pass by three gates before you take a left, and then keep on taking lefts until you get to Gate 30A, and then you’ll need to go straight until you run into Gate 39A.”
“Oh,” May said, not absorbing any of the directions. James had come up to her side, though, and hopefully he’d gotten some of them. If they even mattered anymore. “Well, we’ve got the flight at 7:00 A.M. to London
“Going to see the royal wedding, eh?” the man said with a smile. “Well I’d reckon you could make it if you rented a car and drove...”
May hadn’t quite given up on making the flight. She glanced at the board again, only to see it displaying “7:00 A.M.” where it had previously said “BOARDING”.
“Does that mean the flight just left?” May asked, pointing to the board, hoping for the best and totally not prepared for the worst.
The old man peered at the board for a moment, and then replied to May’s utter despair, “I’m afraid so. But as I said, you could still make it if you take a car…”
“Thanks,” May said to the man, but she heard the words as if from a distance. She felt like she was pretty close to a total mental breakdown, or at least passing out, both of which would be very Bad.
James nodded to the man in thanks before carefully taking May by the shoulders and steering her to one of the uncomfortable airport chairs. They sat down, and May put her head in her hands. She moaned through her fingers, “What am I going to do? We’ll never make it to the wedding in time!”
James pried her fingers away from her face and quickly signed, Calm down. We’ll be okay. You heard the man. We can rent a car. London
“Oh, James,” May sighed, “You’re a godsend! Seriously, thank you so much! Let’s go!” She hugged James, who squirmed a bit, and then she jumped up quickly, second wind regained. They could still make it, if they rushed. And she was good at rushing.
Wait, signed James, catching her sleeve as he stood up. His cheeks were a bit flushed – had he been blushing? – but he looked deadly serious now. He leveled his dark gray eyes on her, leaning down a bit to look her in the eye. The intensity of his gaze unsettled her a little. You know I don’t like it when you go away when I’m in the middle of signing something.
With a guilty pang, May remembered leaving to find the airport official when James was still saying something. She knew that behavior irritated him. When she was first learning sign language, just a month after meeting James and becoming friends, she would do that a lot. He’d be signing something, she wouldn’t really be understanding, and then she’d remember that she had to do this or that and jump up to attend to it. James had pulled her aside and let her know that bothered him, and she’d promised not to do it anymore. She’d been pretty good, too, but today she had been so stressed.
“I’m sorry,” she apologized sincerely. “I was just stressed and not thinking.”
James’s intense stare softened slightly. I understand, he signed. Besides, you never think.
“You jerk,” May said with a smile. James smirked.
Now let’s go rent a car, he signed.
♥♥♥
James had to drive the car, because he was British and he knew how to drive on the wrong side of the road. And on the opposite side of the car. He also knew how to drive from Manchester to London
All of these reasons made sense, but that didn’t make it any better for May, sitting in the passenger seat and watching the clock tick. She couldn’t help but feel like James should be driving faster, should be a bit more aggressive, British courtesy or not.
With James driving, it was also harder to make conversation with him. But they managed.
“It’s too bad you don’t have any vocal cords,” May said casually, an edge of teasing to her voice. James glanced at her, his eyebrows creeping up to his hairline. May finished with a grin, “If you could talk, I bet you’d have an English accent. And that’d be so nice to listen to.”
James rolled his eyes, but he was smiling, so May knew that he’d taken the ribbing good-naturedly. But she could tell something was up his sleeve when he smirked. He leaned down to pick up his iPod, which they’d connected to the car’s stereo, and deliberately played Lady Gaga’s "Born This Way."
“I’m beautiful in my way
‘Cause God makes no mistakes
I’m on the right track baby
I was born this way
Don’t hide yourself in regret
Just love yourself and you’re set
I’m on the right track baby
I was born this way”
Lady Gaga belted out from the car’s speakers. Now it was May’s turn to roll her eyes and smile. “I get it, British boy,” she said. “And just so you know, us Americans don’t find it very many to have Lady Gaga on your iPod.”
James risked taking one hand off the steering wheel long enough to sign, Sod off, American girl. I’ve been in your heathen country for six months, and all the guys have Lady Gaga on their iPods.
“You must be hanging out with only gay guys, then,” May muttered, just loudly enough for James to hear. He just gave her a Look and turned up the volume.
♥♥♥
The clock read 9:45 A.M. The wedding started at 10:00 A.M. And they were stuck in traffic. May was close to banging her head against the window. The only reason that she restrained herself was because she didn’t want to get a concussion and then have to go to the hospital and have no chance of seeing the wedding at all.
“I can’t believe this is happening!” May groaned. “Fifteen minutes, and we’re thirty minutes away from London
James looked like he wasn’t sure what to do for once. He bit his lip, and May suddenly realized how endearing that was. Almost as cute as his silent sneezes.
Whoa. Endearing? Where did that come from?
Weirdness brought about by losing her only attempt to witness true love, probably.
The traffic was crawling along so slowly that James had plenty of time to sign. I’m sorry, his hands said. I drove as fast as I could. But we should’ve known that there would be a lot of traffic on the morning of the wedding.
“If you say that thing about hoping for the best but expecting the worst again, I swear I’ll skin you to within and inch of your life,” May threatened.
James shrugged. I wasn’t going to mention it, I swear.
May didn’t respond. She was mulling over her options. Realistically, May knew that there was no chance that they would get to London Britain
Okay, but what could she do? She and James both had packed enough to stay for a week, at least. They planned to travel around after seeing the wedding. May had shown James what she could of America , and now he would show her what he could of England
James tapped her hand lightly to get her attention. When she looked over, he quickly signed, We can’t make the wedding, but we can see it live on TV. I know a bar near here that has loads of TVs. They’ll be showing the wedding for sure.
Live on TV? May considered it. Sure, it was nothing compared to physically being there. But she would at least physically be in England
Her mind made up, May nodded firmly and graced James with a small smile. “That’d be great, James. Thanks. You really are a godsend.”
James blushed, but he looked pleased.
♥♥♥
The bar was really noisy, crowded, dimly lit, and smelled of old beer. But James was right – it had a lot of TVs, all large flatscreens, and all showing the royal wedding. May gripped James’s hand tightly so she didn’t lose him in the crowd, and they wove their way to the counter. Miraculously, there were two stools open. James and May settled in to them and looked up at the nearest TV.
Kate was just leaving her hotel. She was trying to get into the limo without showing too much of her dress, but it looked like there were cameras all over. Then the TV cut to the inside of Westminster Abbey, which had been lavishly decorated for the wedding. They had brought trees inside. Real live trees.
“What would you like?” the bartender asked them just as the TV turned to commercials. May turned her attention to the pub’s menu and frowned a bit. Judging by the smell of the place, this wasn’t the classiest bar in London
“I’ll have a virgin piña colada,” she ordered. May wanted to be I sober when she met her one true love.
“And your sweetheart?” the bartender asked for a wink. It took a while for May to realize that he was talking about James. She felt her face heat up and quickly released James’s hand, which she had unknowingly kept holding.
“Uh, he’s not – we’re not – we’re not together,” May explained, carefully not looking at James and trying to ignore how badly she was blushing.
“Oh, my apologies!” the bartender said. “It’s just that you two seem so comfortable together.” He thankfully let the topic drop and turned to James. May chanced a glance at him and saw that he was red, too.
“What would you like, sir?” the bartender asked.
James gestured with his fingers, flipping his index finger back and forth between him and May. The bartender looked confused, probably thinking that James was making some statement about their possibly “sweetheart” status, but May understood what he was saying.
“He’ll have what I’m getting,” she translated. James nodded vigorously.
“Alright,” the bartender said dubiously, and glided away. James and May sat awkwardly for a moment, and then James turned to May, hands flying.
Sometimes I feel like I should wear a sign that says ‘mute’ so we could save all the trouble.
“Aw, but it’s so much fun to see their confused faces,” May responded.
James smirked. True.
It seemed like they were just going to ignore the whole “sweetheart” thing. And May decided that she was fine with that. Really.
♥♥♥
It’d been a while, and they were about to witness the royal kiss. Not the one on the balcony – that would come later – but the one that sealed their marriage.
May’s piña colada was nearly empty, and James’s was nearly ¾ gone. The bartender had placed them with a “Cheers” and thankfully no other comment. May had been busy watching the wedding… but she had also been busy thinking.
She and James, sweethearts? They looked “comfortable” together? What did that even mean?
She didn’t know the first thing about true love. That was why she was watching this wedding in the first place. This romantic wedding, where you could tell that Will and Kate really loved each other. They were “sweethearts” and so much more. They were about to be husband and wife.
James was cute. She was willing to admit that. He was tall and blonde with beautiful gray eyes that would melt even the coldest heart. He had pale skin and a small, aristocratic nose with a bit of an upward tilt to it. He had the most beautiful hands.
And he was mute. But she’d learned to deal with that easily enough when she became his friend. How much harder when his muteness be if they became lovers?
Wait. Lovers? Where did that come from? She was just trying to figure out how the bartender mistook them for “sweethearts”. That was all.
Still, May knew that once you got a thought started on its treacherous course, it would continue to the end, no matter how much she tried to stop it. So she let herself entertain the fancy as she watched the royal couple on the TV.
Lovers had intimacy. There was undeniable. Sure, her parents lacked intimacy, but they didn’t really love each other. Her sister and her sister’s boyfriend fought all the time, but sometimes they’d look at each other and there’d be something so personal in their eyes that May would feel like she was intruding. They had intimacy, sometimes.
And what could be more intimate than a mute lover? If she became “sweethearts” with James, she’d get to know him better than anyone. His muteness wouldn’t be a problem at all. They’d communicate with just looks.
It’s not like his muteness was a problem now, anyway. They communicated just fine. She could understand sign language pretty well, even if she couldn’t use it much just yet.
The royal couple was about to kiss, but May found her eyes turn to James instead. He was staring at the TV, looking enraptured. The light from the TVs all around the room played across his skin and white shirt, turning them different colors. A lock of blond hair hung near his eyes. Without thinking, May tucked it behind his ear.
James jumped a little and turned to look at her, his expressive eyes wide with surprise. There was a question in them – What are you doing? May wished she knew.
Will and Kate were leaning towards each other. They were going to kiss any second now.
Suddenly, May knew what she was going to do. She was going to kiss James. At the same time that Will kissed Kate. The royal couple would unite them.
James was still looking at her oddly. No, he wasn’t looking at her, May realized with a smile – he was looking at her lips. He dragged his eyes up to hers and raised his hands, probably to ask a question. But May shook her head and leaned in.
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Will and Kate kiss on live TV. She’d somehow managed to have her timing off, just as it’d been off the whole day. But seconds later, James’s lips met hers and her screwed up timing didn’t matter anymore.
In the following moments, May realized two things. One, James might not be able to talk with that mouth of his. But he sure could kiss. And two… she had found her true love after all.
THE END! J
Wow - when this was just an idea I wasn't sure how much of a story it would make. But you've done it again with your descriptions and characterizations. Loved the two of them and the progression of their relationship was totally believable. Really enjoyed reading it. Great "finding love" story made even better by the additions of a "quest" to England and a mute lover. Also loved how our experience with a delayed plane made it into there!
ReplyDeleteYou might be labeling the topic as fluff but the prose certainly is not! This kept my interest line by line, section by section. I just took a course on the role of an editor, and we were advised to point out parts that "don't work for me" or where "I was bored", characters that were under-developed, etc. None of that applies for me! You have a knack at creating interesting characters and situations, pacing revelations -- that keeps me scrolling eagerly and wanting more (or a sequel?).
ReplyDeletewow - it may be fluff but it is very good fluff! I really liked this story even though I am not a fan of romance… and the happy ending, though anticipated, doesn't feel contrived. Even though I had a general idea exactly where this was headed, and even though it turned out much as expected, I still found my gaze was glued to the page. It isn't easy to make a story intriguing throughout, but you manage, even with a relatively long one. Things that made it interesting were those aspects of it that were not expected, and they abounded. Having James be mute added a very interesting and exciting twist to the story, and I loved your descriptions of his manoeuvres and interactions. Them missing the actual wedding was also a surprise to me, and a pleasant one. Details like those make the story not fluff, not cheese, but interesting! Thanks for another incredible story!
ReplyDeleteTap. Tap. Tap. Her fingers made beautiful noises - you have such a knack for the littlest things. (whether consciously or not). Starting with a noise really brings out the contrast between a speaking partner and a mute one. It's cool to see James's reaction to it, too. It highlights what becomes a major issue – her impatience contrasted with his easy manner. Also, the structure of sentences, even, is somewhat poetic. The opening line says so much about the story, and having a good opening is essential!
He merely raised one barely-there blond eyebrow with a slight smirk. … James just kept smirking. … he had to be. - I love how you introduce him by his actions before telling us that he is mute. It gives us a weird twist when you conclude that sentence. The oder here helps avoid preconceptions of muteness, and demonstrates how he has adapted.
She concentrated carefully; she was still getting the hang of sign language. - torn over this. option 1: maybe show that struggle more, punctuate his signings with "something"'s, e.g. Something fine hoping for the best, something should something prepare for the worst.
as it is it reads like dialogue with half italicised. option 2: maybe that's the point. you show how they can communicate perfectly even without perfect speech. the way she interprets his gestures makes senesce because that is reflecting the depth of their relationship. okay, you probability already thought this through, but in case you hadn't.
The first time … she’d found it strange that he made no sound. But she was getting more used to it - great little detail, brings him to life, and shows the ways they are getting "comfortable" with each other.
If it was possible for hands to have a tone, then his tone was sarcastic. - a spot of humour, and a wee hint to the depth of interaction he can manage to communicate wordlessly. (And I'll stop trying to sound british now.)
James might just be going for a quick fling. But May was going because she wanted to see true love. - took me a little to figure out that the "quick fling" vs "true love" thing wasn't concerning the two of them. I had assumed they were together (because obviously their interaction shows that sort of intimacy, and their realising it is the challenge of the story.) Maybe refer to James as May's "friend" a few times at least.
Her parent’s lackluster marriage … vicious fights between her sister and her sister’s boyfriend … Her last relationship had lasted all of three weeks - good backstory to highlight some of the reasons for why she is this way, and why she is so slow to realise what she and James have.
He had really nice teeth, May noticed. Much nicer than she’d heard that the English had. / True love. She’d find true love in just three hours. - I love the little thoughts you pout in that show almost a foetal understanding, but which she interrupts in the usual hasty style (symbolism of the interrupting James's signing, perhaps - just made that connexion, and well done!) The irony of the contrast to the next statement is impeccable.
♥♥♥ - loved these. great little touch. Next story should be about poker so you can do all the suits. Or you can do it about Johnny Appleseed ()
ReplyDelete“Don’t say I told you so.” / I told you so. / What? I didn’t say it. - great and hilarious interaction again illustrating their comfort and ease of communicating and bantering, even despite the obvious setbacks. In a story where the conflict arises from the mc being unable to communicate well within her own thoughts/feelings, the choice of a mute partner wrks into it extremely well!
Somehow, she couldn’t express as much sarcasm with her voice and James could with his hands. - and this parallels that frustration, that he is so much more composed, assured, etc., despite being mute. I get the feeling that he's pretty sure he's found love in her, but he's waiting, either to give her time (good guy) or because he is uncomfortable (but you don't blame him for being hesitant, because I'd imagine it would be hard as a sort of cripple to have to ask someone else to out up with you like that) or maybe afraid (that she'd say no.)
May saw no reason to challenge that role now. - part of her problem, well demonstrated.
She’d gotten the gist of what he was saying. - I like how he doesn't like this, when in reality (option 2) most of the italics are probably just May "getting the gist" of what is actually being signed. It's about how he feels, whether he feels like he's had his say, and how he likes to take it slow and finish on his own time.
both of which would be very Bad. - capitalisation here was a little more distracting than helpful to me. If random capitalisation for emphasis is something you want to do in the story, maybe make it a little more common (I think you use it only about three times that I noticed) and that way the reader gets accustomed to it and not pulled away from the story. Alternatively, use grandiose words to describe it, which should get the same overexaggerated urgency across e.g. both of which would be gruesomely and apocalyptically abominable. Okay, that's too much, and maybe there isn't a better way to capture that sentiment exactly.
James nodded to the man in thanks before carefully taking May by the shoulders and steering her to one of the uncomfortable airport chairs. They sat down, and May put her head in her hands. She moaned through her fingers, “What am I going to do? We’ll never make it to the wedding in time!”
James pried her fingers away from her face and quickly signed, Calm down. We’ll be okay. You heard the man. We can rent a car. London is only about 200 miles from here. I’ve driven that way before. If we go fast, and there’s not much traffic, we should be able to make it. I’ll pay.
“Oh, James,” May sighed, “You’re a godsend! Seriously, thank you so much! Let’s go!”
She hugged James, who squirmed a bit - good hint, in passing so that the reader sort of rushes by it. It's great how you make her "good at rushing" (highlighting that in your next sentence) so that she can miss the sighs that something is developing.
had he been blushing? – but he looked deadly serious now. - great, you do it again! but she doesn't take a moment to stop and analyse the reactions. maybe it's not only his signing that james wants her to not ignore halfway through, but his other means of communication as well, which she just totally ignored.
deliberately played Lady Gaga’s "Born This Way." … I was born this way” - just got to say, super kudos for using lady gaga lyrics in a meaningful and serious way in your story. you should get kudos for using lady gaga in the story, period, but extra because it actually works! who would have known?
He just gave her a Look and turned up the volume. - works this time and a little less distracting.
suddenly realized how endearing that was. … Whoa. Endearing? Where did that come from? - really funny and good because it also shows the beginnings of her realisation that we keep reading to see.
ReplyDeleteWeirdness brought about by losing her only attempt to witness true love - again, these cover-thoughts contrast so nicely with the ones before, and the irony is so strong!
fizzed and died. - sad little image.
the whole twist here took me by surprise, and worked really well, I think. because we all know that she was going to the wedding for all the wrong reasons. what I'd expected was a I-came-to-find-love-and-realsied-when-I-got-there-I-had-it-in-you-all-along. Your way is much less cliché.
As Lady Gaga sang, God makes no mistakes. - über-super kudos! (and great line too. who knew Lady Gaga had meaningful lyrics?)
James blushed, but he looked pleased. - I like how you let this end the scene, without her thinking anything to cobbler up his signs of affection.
“And your sweetheart?” … It took a while - it's interesting how long it takes, you'd think that she has some idea, or what is the need for all the self denial. unless that's what's making her hesitate to understand, since so much of the story is about understanding or not.
trying to ignore how badly she was blushing. - she does know. the whole struggle inside her is well played out and very fun to read.
It seemed like they were just going to ignore the whole “sweetheart” thing. And May decided that she was fine with that. Really. - maybe one of the capitalised "Fine"'s might work here, seems to kind of fit with the capitalising attitude as far as I can understand it. Because that's only the denying part of her talking.
¾ - little technical thing, most style books say to write out numbers unless they're in a few exceptional circumstances, such as years (back in 1229…) dates (meet me on the 26th) addresses (I live in 86 third street, but used to live on 88th street) and really big irregular numbers (there must be 212,650 mosquitoes in here!)
She and James, sweethearts? They looked “comfortable” together? What did that even mean? - this reflexion is warmly anticipated!
He was tall and blonde with beautiful gray eyes that would melt even the coldest heart. … most beautiful hands. - I love this description, that we get so late. but it fits here, because it's like she is noticing him for the first time.
if they became lovers? / Wait. Lovers? Where did that come from? - I love the way this proceeds! Probably the best part of the story!
she let herself entertain the fancy - finally what we've been waiting for! a very satisfying moment. And again, the flow from reflexion to story and back is so artfully done!
In the following moments, May realized two things. One, James might not be able to talk with that mouth of his. But he sure could kiss. And two… she had found her true love after all. - yes, sounds a little corny, but there's a part in all of us that likes that, and this end is promising and comforting. It's best to imagine their future together, and leave it here. Good end point, and I love this last sentence!
THE END! J - again, great piece that is only fluff if you read about 3% of it. and yes that should technically be "three percent" but I was lazy. Sorry if his feels a little overanalysed at parts but college gets one into the mood of overanalysing things. Still, any connexions or symbols made are probably there even if you didn't intend them to be, because your subconscious often has a really good idea of where you want to go. When you know your story and characters well, it shows, and this is how I see it. Again, amazing! It's not easy to get me to fall in love with a romance, punniness totally intended, so you better laugh.
great story D